Still Lives: Visual Diaries by Youth Leaders of Holland Bloorview’s Youth Advisory Council

In collaboration with the Koffler Centre of the Arts, Youth Leaders from Holland Bloorview Kids Rehabilitation Hospital took part in a unique photography project during the first few months of the COVID-19 pandemic.

Through a series of virtual workshops, participants learned how to combine photography and text to create “visual diaries” that provide insight into what life can look like for individuals living with disabilities. This collection reflects upon the diverse experiences of everyday living, particularly for those living on the margins in times of crisis, uncertainty, and social isolation.

Over the course of six weeks, the Koffler’s Mary Anderson, Manager of Literary & Public Programs, gave lectures and weekly assignments on photography that encouraged participants to explore the medium in various ways. Using cell phones and digital cameras, Youth Leaders constructed photographs of the objects, people, and spaces that surrounded them – all of which had to be accessible for documentation. This imagery was shared in group critique each week with the goal of not only enhancing creative expression, but solidifying a sense of artistic community and collaboration.

Still Lives showcases the complexities of living life in marginalized contexts. And the aspiration is that viewers feel a sense of empathy and compassion for witnessing these kinds of experiences.

Listen to the project description as an audio recording.

View and/or download a PDF version of the Still Lives visual diaries.

Alex

We’re All in This Together
Camera: iPhone

My experience doing this piece was eye-opening. I never would have imagined in my entire life that I would be in quarantine. On March 13, my life had turned completely upside down. It was the day before March Break and as a student about to graduate high school the next year, I had a couple of university tours planned. I was very excited as any student would be about going on these much anticipated tours. In fact, I booked these tours way in advance! But when I heard that our province was going to be on lockdown and that my plans were cancelled, I was devastated.

Before COVID-19, I had school and extracurricular activities such as YAC and Youth In Charge to go to. I even had my own exercise routine where I would go walk outside my condo building. Being from a large tight-knit family, I would get together with my relatives at least once a month. Now everything is online and visitors are limited. Each day, I spend a good portion of my day at my desk doing school work on my school computer that I take back and forth every day. My walks are now in the hallways of my condo. I am only allowed outside at the back of the building. Entertainment has been mostly watching TV, watching videos on YouTube, baking, making jelly, listening to music, language learning, pizza nights - and of course - dance parties! I have at least one Zoom call a week.

Bianca

A Little Piece of Heaven
Camera: iPhone

This pandemic has taught me a lot, but it has especially taught me how to just relax, breath and try to focus on what is really important. My family has been my support system through all this, but especially my mom. If it wasn’t for her, I don’t think I would have taken the time to relax and enjoy what is around me.

In my photo project, I wanted to show pictures that are relevant as to how I have felt during this time, and whom I go to for support. Some of these pictures also show where I feel the most comfortable and how and where I spend most of my time. My photos also show a bit of what I find inspirational. I have done a lot of reflecting during this time, and I feel that in a weird way, this has made me a better version of myself. At first, I didn’t know what to put in this photo project, but as I thought about it I just imagined putting photos that made me feel calm and that’s what inspired me to do this project.

I feel that this pandemic is difficult for everyone, but particularly for people with disabilities because our depression and anxieties are worse at this time, and it was already difficult for us when the pandemic wasn’t happening to get around. I would hope this would give viewers a sense of clarity.

Effie

Then & Now
Camera: Canon Rebel SL1

Then & Now is a visual story of seven individual photographs that collectively invite you into an intimate overview of my “normal” day-to-day life impacted by the COVID-19 pandemic. Each picture has been contrasted, using both black-and-white and colour in correlation, to represent my pre-pandemic and current lifestyle.

The story begins at the start of my day when I wake up in the morning. Stay-at-home orders have caused me to work from home facilitating inclusion programming virtually.

One recommended safety measure is wearing a facemask where social distancing is not possible. Following this simple precaution with asthma makes it difficult for me to breathe in public spaces. When I do venture out, I either walk or bike around my neighbourhood, rather than hop on a bus.

In my condo lobby, the concierge desk now has red tape on the ground as a visual reminder to remain at a socially safe distance. Having hearing loss and the mandate to keep my 6-foot from others becomes challenging because I can only hear or lip-read when they are closer.

Interacting with loved ones via video-calling allows for easier conversations without struggling to lip-read while they are wearing a mask. Ending the day, I enjoy having a snack which, to limit contact and risk, are now prepared at home.

I hope this photo story showcases how different aspects of my life changed due to the pandemic. And, how the safety measures put in place, present a barrier to my interactions and freedoms as an individual living with a disability.

Emily

24HRS
Camera: Samsung

There are twenty-four hours in a day. Twenty-four hours can seem like excruciating silence or just enough time to check off all your daily tasks. For me, twenty-four quarantine hours have been both long and short, both dynamically exciting and empty. Some days, twenty-four hours are spent scrolling through social media and seeing friends go on walks and hikes while I’d be longing for fresh air. Some days, twenty-four hours entails me wrestling with the reality and limitations of being an immunocompromised and fragile body who wouldn’t dare risk going outside. Other days, twenty-four hours are spent immersing myself into new and exciting hobbies like baking and cooking, activities that – ironically enough – were never explored because of time constraints. Still, other twenty-four hours invoke a sense of trapped helplessness as I realize it may be months before a broken wheelchair display can be fixed safely.

As I reflect on the malleability and flexibility of twenty-four hours, I realize that every moment counts. Every moment spent with your loved ones engaging in long midnight talks or embarking on afternoon walks become all the more meaningful when you dissect twenty-four hours into moments to create memories. New appreciations for nature and the simplicity of spending family time come to light in twenty-four hours. Finally, as the sun sets and my twenty third and twenty fourth hours are filled with the laughter of friends through my computer screen, I’m reminded that there are twenty-four hours in a day and that every moment counts.

Kate

Pandemic
Camera: iPhone

To help me through COVID-19, I have a service dog that helps me a lot with my mental health. I have been thinking about my sister throughout these hard times. I have been reading to help past the time. I have been getting out more with my service dog to help with stress. I have also been playing games, as well. I have also been spending time with friends.

Leo

Isoteric
Camera: iPhone

When lockdown came, I knew I’d be in it for the long haul. My mom had traveled home to China for Chinese New Year and saw the damage the Coronavirus was causing there. Though I thought I’d have trouble adjusting to life at home, I soon began to appreciate the break in stress and life I never knew I needed. I finally got caught up on shows my friends were raving about and got to really know the people in my neighbourhood and the passion they have for others during a tragic time.

My faith is also very important to me and I’m grateful for the extra time to focus on God and reflect on the world and difficulties facing all of us. I contacted old friends and classmates and our shared experiences seemed to shorten the time we had spent apart. I’ve also enjoyed focusing on the simple wonders of nature, spending time in my backyard, spending time around the garden and spotting birds.

One of my biggest challenges during lockdown is being around the same people every day and not physically being around my friends, but we’ve been very supportive of each other and often meet on video calls and online games. I wonder how the world might forever change following the pandemic and how it reacts to a second wave, but nevertheless, I look forward to being a greater part of society and how we will continue supporting one another, as the current situation has shown us we should.

Logan

Temporary Home
Camera: Nikon 3400

This pandemic has required all of us from across the globe to stay home in order to stay safe which means many typical activities such as school, work, doctors appointments, and social activities have been either cancelled or have to be done from home. As a person with a disability, I rely on support workers to assist with my daily routine. Not only did my daily routine get disrupted during the pandemic - much like everyone else’s, my personal support was also disrupted, leaving me no choice but to spend the majority of the pandemic in a place I don’t call home.

These disruptions have caused a loss of independence that as a person with a disability, I do not take for granted. Many people have had the opportunity to continue their lives from the comfort of their homes but I have not. I want to acknowledge that not everyone’s home is safe and comfortable at this time. Above all else, I am grateful that my temporary home was safe and comfortable but that does not diminish my loss of independence that I grieved. It is my hope that this photo series demonstrates my experience as a person with a disability living in a home that is not my own during a time where the state of the world requires us all to stay home to stay safe.

Mika

A State of Flux
Camera: iPhone

My goal with these photos was to capture how life was interrupted and in many ways rewound by the pandemic, as my living situation changed from a one bedroom apartment on my own, to my parents home, which was in itself in a state of transition as my family prepared to move out.

My experience with being thrust back into the spaces of my childhood, even as they change around me to prepare for sale, exemplify how the pandemic curtailed my movements. But it also allowed me to bear witness to the transformation of a space I was once so familiar with.

These photos capture various stages of the pandemic, from its height, as well as the move towards socially distanced contact, always with a focus on capturing moments which may have otherwise been missed in the rush of everyday life.

Nikky

Resurgence
Camera: iPhone

As a young person living with a disability, life can be challenging to navigate with no restriction. Now adding the new reality of COVID-19, the world is dramatically different. Using my iPhone, I wanted to illustrate the people, places and things that bring me joy and happiness during this unique period of time.

Prior to working on this project, I had little to no confidence in taking photographs, but from the knowledge learned throughout the workshops and the help of my peers, I was able to walk away feeling confident about the work I produced. In addition, I learned that photography can be a powerful tool of self-expression.

As a person with a disability, it can sometimes be challenging to hear my voice within mainstream media channels. By using a device that I use in my everyday life (my iPhone), I was able to voice my experience for others to see. When viewing this work I hope that the viewer is inspired to consider the people, places and things that hold sentimental value in their heart.

Samantha

Just A Little Bit Different
Camera: iPhone

My visual diary titled, Just A Little Bit Different, chronicles my daily life living with a disability during a pandemic. In this work, I wanted to show how in some ways my daily life had stayed the same. I still graduated from university, I still go to work, I volunteer, but just in different ways.

In my daily life before the pandemic started, I took WheelTrans (a public transit system that provides door to door service for people with disabilities) to work independently all the time. Now, because I am not comfortable taking WheelTrans and the booking system has changed, I rely on my parents and my coworker to drive me to work. I am still volunteering, but over Zoom, instead of in-person. I still graduated university, over video, not in a convocation hall.

There are some things that haven’t changed about my life at all. Living with a disability, balance and the possibility of falling, is always something that I have to think about. Because of this, I tend to avoid big groups and prefer to stay home, so, physical distancing has been relatively easy for me. I actually enjoy sitting on my couch scrolling through Netflix. In this pandemic, people are trying to find new ways to connect with their friends, but having to rely on WheelTrans and not always being able to make spur of the moment plans with my friends, means that I am very comfortable. I already text and use video chat to connect with my friends on a regular basis.

While there are some things that I have had to worry about and think about during a pandemic, most of my life has stayed the same. I understand that this is not the case for everyone living with a disability. Everybody’s day to day life in a pandemic will look different.

Sinéad

Pandemonium
Camera: iPhone

The COVID-19 pandemic has impacted everyone around the world, in one way or another. From cancelled vacations to missed graduations to losing a loved one. It has been quite the year so far!

As an individual with a disability and multiple chronic illnesses, it has impacted everything for me. From simply leaving my house to grocery shopping to fearing what will happen if I need to be in hospital due to pre-existing health conditions. Will I be more likely to pick up the virus? If I end up in hospital, will I be able to take my service dog out if I am not allowed visitors? When will I see my family again? These are just a few of the things that have caused great worry for me.

On the other side of the worry is this strange sense of peace. That is what I have tried to capture with my work – how I have coped with the things that have been interrupted in my life – from my health care experience to my normal routine, how I have had to adapt to the ever changing reality we are experiencing, and how I have enjoyed the simpler things like the forced solitude (I haven’t spent this much time outside in well over a year).

I have taken this time as an opportunity to deepen my faith, connect with loved ones, and reevaluate my priorities for once we get back to “normal.”

Tai

Disconnected
Camera: iPhone

Quarantine has changed the way my family and I live our lives. Prior to the outbreak, we lived fast paced days filled with events and activities. I would be lying if I said that it wasn’t difficult to adapt to our new reality. I chose to showcase the pups in my collection of photos because they’re a huge part of our family, and keeping me sane in quarantine. Another thing I often do for comfort is read oracle cards. The desert and the destroyer say a lot about the events in the world, which I felt were very important to include. Lastly, the tree in my backyard – this tree has been in our yard for years, and is a really nice sight. It features our backyard and an important place for me, to be able to go out to and relax.

I have been very lucky to live in an accessible house with access to all I need. My biggest barrier is the lack of physical interaction. I am very social, and it is quite hard staying in a house this entire time. One of my portraits features my sister. I wanted to include different members of my family to show our isolated connectivity, and how we have bonded much more. Despite all the bad things going on, I have found lots of time to relax and enjoy peaceful alone time. I hope that eventually life can get back to normal, or at least as close to it as possible.